The 'Test'

Alhamdulillah, dear readers. How is your Imaan today? We already bear in mind saying that, Imaan will always 'yazid wa yankus' means if translated directly, 'increase and decrease'. In a long phrases sounding like this, " Imaan will always increase and decrease'. Guys, do you all really know the behaviour of ours determine our Imaan? Well, I suggest you to peep back what in Holy Quran and Hadith have said. We are as Muslims, must get struggling and keep the Mujahadah in every seconds and minutes. But I, as a Muslim, sometimes resemble like a dead leaf, waving in the air, slowly, before the leaf reaches the ground gently. How could that be? Others might say, of course this is due to GRAVITY doings. That's way all the things if they are flinging up into the sky, eventually they will return back to the EARTH. Simple conotation, briefly said well. :)

Although it seems impossible to reverse the Laws, but it can be reliable to the others who want to make it as the similarity and great example. But at first you must give them the real fact that they should know. All things. Dont be keep nerd and noob by accepting the knowledge from the giver.Manipulate it. It shows the something special in you. "whoa, simply magnificent." then, you deserve all that. BUT, dont get others wrong regarding the real fact. Okay? ^^

Dont all you aware that, everyday in our lives is TEST? Or you just accept it or commonly not being thoughtful person? Emm, we need to keep thinking, imagining, in order to get the brain work effectively. The real fact for men is, everyday they will think about sex. Even it is just once. And if they are not going to think about that in less than two days, they are abnormal. See? Hoho. I am a man. This is ordinary. No ones can object the Fitrah. About women, emm, you women, suppose to know it yourselves.
Back on the top argument, everyday is a test. Even, we as a Muslim, when it is about time to offer the Solah, we must a bit lazy, "ah, it is still a long time to perform it. Lets do it last minute." At the time being, we are being tested with games, friends, facebooking, Twittering, Googling and so on.
Erm, saying about Googling and YouTubing, the Muslims are supposed to boycott their website in the following date respectively. Which is starting from 21 to 23 September, if I am not mistaken. So dear my beloved Muslims, do your DUTY. My duty too.

Guys, do pray for me, as I will be facing final examination for my 4th semester next week.And currently, I register for five subjects, means 5A should be and ought to be in my grab. With all that,
 many pleasures for you who have spent their time, reading, praying for me.! May ALLAH bless you in return.

Barakallahufikum. ma'akum bittaufiq wan najah. InsyaAllah. Ilal liqa' wa ma'assalamah. ^^

Every little things you do..

Salam a'alaikum warahmatullah. Alhamdulillah, still blessed and recognized by Him and hopefully a little mujahid insya'Allah, absolutely for sure. I'm keen to write today as i got nothing to do for this morning. Nothing to do?? Haha, actually i do have one, but i dont think i want to imitate somehow.
Now I'm going to share with all of you, what I have done for today. What be my hope is, my doings would not be underestimated and false-perception by others including my best pals, my family partners, dear lecturers and so on.

The first that comes across my mind is, do you ever feel to deceive others feeling? well, there is a story about this. Since juniors enrolled in my college, i acknowledged this person. A girl for sure. She is a type of mine. My likes and prefers. We began to know each other completely (not too close as we just texting whenever there is a needs) via social website, tremendously and famously known as FACEBOOK. Well, if you guys dont know what is facebook, get yourself in advance, okay? ^^
The story-mory begins after the college was about to schedule a holidays. A Hari Raya holidays actually, for a week. In that week, I added her in facebook, and getting to know her. But not really put up that much. Just know her name, and a few picture to depict how she looks like. Hmm, she is really pious girl, quite silent girl and not really active in participating. Of course a shy girl, nice, good manners and ethics. Guys, do you want to know the worst part?? Okay, the worst is since we got to know each other, I sensed that, she liked me. (What??! whoa~ that's terrible..! But I'm the lucky guy here.Well.haha) Well, when I purposely asked her this query, she quite shocked but was well covered. Haha, nice camouflage. Loved that damn much. Means, she is not an ordinary girl like I used to know.

Suddenly I came up with an idea. At that time, i really dont want to take part in loving, or being loved in someone as I was jilted by someone a long time ago since Nemesis empire?? haha.  Just kidding. Then I asked her to do istikharah first. It lasted about 3 days exactly. I also did it. Hehe =D The third days in the morning before dusk nearly Subuh, she texted me, "brother, i did it. I feel really calm and distressful when I think about this matter." Then I replied her text, "Alhamdulillah, i  feel the same thing. Whatever happens, just leave it to God. He will determine the best for us. If we are destined altogether one day, surely it will happen. No worries." Then I started to decide the to make up the relationship with a PROMISE. (err, it seemed, like i was in rush. The best part is, i didnt know what i rushed for. =_=')

After that moments, we are like 'zauj and zaujah'. Surely, you guys know what it feels like. Ough, i feel suffocated. But a little time, as days past, I began to like her. I liked her style. Her hijab. The most important things is she has Deen with her. I tried my best to adapt with her. As we both wanted this relationship in Bless. Insya'Allah. But things seem gonna change. Right?? (Otoke=Otokajo..!!)
I began more 'wild' in this relationship. I tried to accommodate her feelings, clashed her (actually, this was fake. It is more to an act) tried to change her perceptions that i was a bad guy before. I'm a smoker, illegal racer, gamer-addict and even a playboy. (huh~~) But she convinced me, "You still can change it. I really know you heart. Even if you're the worst man, I ever know, I still believe in you." in a text message. ~hm, heart throbbing, right? Even me, when i read that, ~whoa, she's totally different. Alhamdulillah, maybe this is the person? haha. I need to think a lot more.

And yesterday evening, I asked her, I wanted to back off from the relationship. She quite shocked. 'Where's the promise you promised me for?? " "Well, I got nothing to do with this. Buzz off from me. There's a lot of better guys that is more suitable and better, pious more than me out there." She kept asking, "Please, dont be like this. You're my future zauj. Please dont back off." pleaded her. And I dont want to confront with her, I ended it heartlessly. An hour later, (we were on texting that time) she didnt reply to me and I was curious. I started to feel pity on her and began to embrace it by saying "sorry, i didnt mean it".

Guys, I dont know what should i do now...=(